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Owning Your Own Controls Self Help Articles | October 29 Black Trevon Wesco Jersey , 2005
Do you ever feel like someone or something else holds the controls to your emotions? A so-called button is pushed and the response that follows is not your best? If you want control over your own controls, then understanding how the "mechanism" works and why is essential.
What makes the difference between two children raised in the same environment with the same parents when one ends up a neuro-surgeon and the other a hardened violent criminal? What makes the difference between two patients suffering in a hospice center from identical conditions when one requires very little medication and is liked by all, while the other suffers bitterly regardless of the medication and no one really wants to be around them? What are the subtle differences that seem to allow one person to live a certain life style free of illness while another doing the same things becomes ill as a result? What defines a stimulus as stressful to one while the same exact stimulus is welcomed with excitement by another? The answer is so simple as to be overly obvious.
In my work, I have had the opportunity to work with a wide range of individuals in differing settings, ranging from the inmate incarcerated in maximum security to the terminal patient in the hospice center. Over the years my observations ultimately led to this hypothesis: the persons who seem to suffer most consider themselves to be victims. The classic victim scenario in the prison generally goes something like this: all but for the grace of God there go you. Translated by the inmate population Black Chuma Edoga Jersey , this means something like, "What would you do? Where would you be? After all, my daddy was an alcoholic, my mother was a prostitute and the neighbor boy hung heroine on me when I was only eight".
The fact is, our environment and circumstance do imprint us in profound ways. Our very ability to cope depends in large on our choices and they are predetermined in large by our enculturation process. Thus Black Jachai Polite Jersey , what else could the victim of these tragedies do?We all grow up with some substantially similar ideas and notions about what is fair and acceptable. We all tend to say things like "When I'm a parent, I'll do it differently"; and yet, when our children act in some way that meets with our disapproval, we respond just as our parents did. Psychologist call this process imprinting. In very simple terms, if you raise a duckling with chickens Black Quinnen Williams Jersey , it will behave as a chicken. There is a marvelous story that illustrates this point.
It seems one day that an eagle flew over a chicken coop. To his amazement, pecking in the yard below, was a large gathering of chickens and a lone, beautiful female eagle. He swooped down for a closer look and the chickens together with the eagle fled to the chicken house. For days the eagle watched the chickens from a distance until one day he was certain that he could stop the beautiful eagle before she reached the chicken house. With the prowess of an eagle he was suddenly in between the eagle and the chicken house. She trembled. He spoke, "What are you doing living down here like a chicken". She answered Black Le'Veon Bell Jersey , "I am a chicken". He argued, showing her the similarities between himself and her. He told her of what it was like to be an eagle and soar high above the earth. His stories only frightened her. Finally she said, "Well if I'm an eagle then you will not harm me". He responded in the affirmative. She said, "Then step back and show me." As he stepped backed she seized the opportunity to run into the chicken house. When the other chickens questioned her about the encounter, she told them all of how she had outsmarted the eagle. Of course Black C.J. Mosley Jersey , all the chickens commended her for tricking the eagle.
Many of us are like the female eagle. We outsmart ourselves with betrayals of who we really are. Our choices are predicated on our beliefs and our beliefs have been adopted from the same process inherent to the story about the chickens and the chicken house. Here is another example of how this kind of reason pervades who and what we are.
One day a man walking the streets of Manhattan passed beneath a high rise complex that consisted of very expensive condominiums. As he passed under the balcony of one of the two story units a flower pot which had been placed precariously close to the balcony edge fell and crashed down on his head. Now imagine this man's choices. What could he do? What would be the normal thing to do? Well, he could take the broken pot back to its owners and put it guess where. Administer a beating to the idiot that put the flower pot too close to the edge, that's what most people respond with as their first thought when I have presented this scenario to audiences. What else could he do? Well, he could be metaphysical. You know, kismet Black Curtis Martin Jersey , what's to be will be, after all, maybe the blow to his head rearranged some neurons and now he will experience higher consciousness. So just be metaphysical and act as if it was supposed to happen and just go on down the road. What else could he do? Well, he could be an opportunist. You know that flower pot fell from a wealthy person's ledge. Whip lash, concussion Black Braden Mann Jersey , something like that---sue the sucker!What else could he do? What would you do? How about taking the flower to a florist, potting it and returning it as a gift of love? Could you just as well do that? Of all the possibilities, which one do you think would produce the best outcome for yourself in terms of happiness, wholeness and even health?The fact is, the normal person has been trained to behave in a normal manner. Normal means that they have a right to become angry and exact punishment. Robert Laing once said something like "normal man has educated himself to be normal and thus to become absurd" in his book THE POLITICS OF EXPERIENCE. The emotional reaction termed anger is just oH. Wholesale Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys From China Wholesale Cheap Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys From China Wholesale Authentic Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys China Wholesale Jerseys China Wholesale Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys From China Wholesale Authentic Soccer Jerseys |
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